Going Home

I’m going home to the place I belong

To stay there for a few weeks to take care of business

To replace my broken pair of glasses

And just to clear my head of all this nonsense

Don’t worry everyone the Prodigal Son will return

Rhyming for the win!

Am I Gay?: A Journey of Self Discovery with Shang.

afternoonsnoozebutton:

twelve-jammy-badgers:

Well this was pretty perfect.

Mysterious as the dark side of the moon.

(Source: thracekara, via masterchiefsupremecommander)

bipolarbacon:

i just wish that your words
could caress me
like my hands would
when i think of you—

oh, how my fingertips
long for the vague familiarity
of your fleeting touch, with
your breath-ridden voice
saying my name in a
whisper of stolen kisses

in a sea of faces
i would see you first,
before i close my eyes
and right after my first breath
early in the morning
i only think of you—

i wish to see only you
and no one else.

Optimism

I read a story the other day, and it caught my interest. There was a girl who lived in a small town outside of San Diego. And she wrote a poem during a quiet Saturday night. She said,

“Dear diary I have a lot to say

So i’m writing it here in a private way

Here I can write and be completely honest

When I look ahead my days are full of promise

I just started the 9th grade and it’s wonderful

I bought a cute beanie made of wool

And jeans that say, ‘Yes I’m nice, but still cool.’

I couldn’t love high school more than I do now

I’ll be studying hard to make my mother proud

Diary, something incredible happened today

After lunch a cute guy bumped into me and made

My heart flutter and head spin

He had the most wonderful eyes and chiseled chin

He was so nice, I think i’m in love

Will my face be cute enough?

Even now when I think about it him I blush

He seems like just the guy a girl like me would trust

How dreamy, and sexy he was

I even made sure to get another peek at his butt

But yes, Diary, I love high school

Nothing can get me down and out of my good mood.”

Obviously she was having the time of her life. She seemed like a happy girl. I kept reading and saw another poem she wrote a month later. She wrote, 

“Today was not such a good day

It was even worse than yesterday

i keep being teased by these girls in class

They make fun of my small breasts and ‘flat ass’

I laugh and try to pass it off as if they were joking

But they don’t realize it’s my spirit they’ve broken

I go home and cry myself to sleep

I hope I feel better in the morning but honestly,

I wake up and my heart is in pieces

And even worse, the guy I bumped into hates me

He always glares at me so hatefully

I don’t understand what I had done wrong

I only want to talk to him and go with him to prom

Should I have waited for him to come to me?

I told him I liked him, I don’t think he took my seriously.

Every night I pray to my father God

to please help me and make it all stop.”

I remember thinking, “Woah, what the hell?” Such a sweet girl didn’t deserve such cruel treatment. There was another poem. She says,

“High school is a living hell

I hate it all everyone can go fuck themselves

Today I found out my best friend Jess

Went out with a guy and had sex

She didn’t just tell me

She had to give me the whole fucking story

She told me how it hurt and how she bled

Honestly, fuck her, I didn’t listen to a fucking word she said

And those bitches who made fun of my tits and ass

Told me she fucked the guy I liked from class

Every day those cunts laugh at me

You know why? Because I haven’t lost my fucking virginity

And what’s even more fucked up is that every night I cry

No guy will fuck me no matter how fucking hard I try

I wear the sluttiest skirts 

And wear so much makeup that it hurts

Still no guy will even look at me

I flirt so much trying to lose my virginity

I fucking hate school everyone is a fucking fake

I don’t like my reflection I fucking hate this fucking face

Why are my tits so fucking small

Why is it that I have no ass at all

I look like fucking shit compared to other girls

I think I am the ugliest hag in the world

Am I so unattractive that no guy wants to fuck me?

I only want my pussy fucked so I can live on happily

No not even that I only want a simple kiss

What was it growing up that I missed?

Why am I so broken and wrong?

Why did it take me 14 years to buy my first thong?

And why is it that hurt and heartbreak is the only thing I feel?

And why is it that pain is the only thing that’s real.

Why should I choose to keep living.

Amongst the scum that are so unforgiving.

I don’t know if it’s right anymore.

This world is only making me want to be a whore.

And if being a whore is what it takes

Then why should I keep living on in this hellish place?”

I was quite astonished. She seemed like such a sweet and innocent girl, unaffected by peer pressure. But I guess kids these days are relentless. And they could even get to a girl with the strongest spirit. My heart breaks for her.

Whatever she’s doing now, I hope she hasn’t lost herself.

But me hoping won’t be much help.

A Penny For Your Thoughts

A Fortune Cookie

They say fortune cookies tell the future

They say they speak of the big picture

They foretell of prosperity, happiness, or love

I don’t believe all this hocus pocus stuff

Fiction, myth, the stuff of legend

Superstition, lucky charms, lucky number’s seven

It was the day I went to restaurant

Thinking pensively what I would want

Maybe I wanted wealth or happiness

But above all I wanted answers, I guess

Many of my friends came and said these cookies were no joke

Apparently these fortunes came true and worked better than you hoped

The fortunes were spot on, told the future this was what I was told

So I went to the place to see for my self

And this place was pretty sketch as far as I could tell

The host was blind and old as shit

I wasn’t liking the vibe, not one bit

What’s crazier was that this restaurant didn’t serve food

Not Kung Pao chicken not even Mu Gu Gai Pu

I waited a minute, lost in my own thoughts

When a beautiful asian woman, exotic, and smelling of jasmine

said to me, “From here without and within.

you will be fated, maybe cursed, or destined

to be tied to this cookie’s fortune.”

She dropped the cookie in my hand

I didn’t know what else to do but stand

And stare at her, speechless 

Honestly I was too scared to even eat this

But I disregarded the fear and cracked it open

I hoped for the best, hoped it held a good omen

I saw the paper and it read, “For you will find True Love

but for True Love’s sake, you’ll find yourself dead”

I pondered the thought and found it amusing

And figured that my friends had just been trolling

First off, there would be no way I would find true love

I’d never had a girlfriend, never liked one enough

Never found a girl I fancied, not even one

So I slept that night laughing to myself

Burying all the feelings of young, dumb, hope I felt

Sure I wanted to find love, who doesn’t?

But I know I sure wouldn’t find it, I couldn’t

For years I’ve tried, but to no avail

After years, try I may, but always to fail

So no way this cookie would work, it was all fake

I would never find love it was too late

I woke up the next morning feeling same as always

I felt it was going to be one of those shitty days

So I got dressed and went to the local coffee stand

Walking around with the fortune still in my hand

I tossed it into the the dumpster garbage can

I got myself a coffee from a nice gay man

Something odd happened, the homo said, 

“Sir you forgot something, don’t leave yet.”

He gave me the fortune and I stood, astonished

It was strange that such a little thing wouldn’t vanish

It must have meant something I thought

Especially if it didn’t want to get lost

I walked out into the street

And before I knew it I was swept off my feet

On my broken back, staring at the clouds

People worried, gathering around

The last thing I remembered was a beautiful woman

And then I woke up in a hospital, it was so sudden

There I lay, and she was sitting next to my bed

She told me she hit me with her car and thought I was dead

I told her I wouldn’t have died so easily

Then laughed at my own joke which I must’ve told cheesily

It worked though because she stayed with me til I went home

She helped me recover until I could walk on my own

It had been 3 months since we had first met

Every day when I was crippled, she spent next to my bed

It was odd, at first I thought she was helping me out of pity

But soon it was clear, she just wanted to be with me

As more time passed we grew closer

And nothing made me happier than to just hold her

I could see us in the future, living happily ever after

Most nights we’d spend together, just talking

It was wonderful I’d remember time just stopping

It was to that point where I wanted to make the move

I felt if I didn’t I might lose her soon

I didn’t want to forget her I loved her too much

And I wanted to find love while I was still young

And on that day I chose to take her to chinese

While we waited for food I got on my knees

Ring in my hand, I had the words ready

I was nervous, and all my confidence left me

At that moment some goons broke in

And all the cash in the register was at once stolen

But these guys didn’t just want money, they wanted blood

They mowed down the customers one by one

I took action and threw myself on top of my wife

Hoping that I could maybe save her life

And at once day turned to night

I wasn’t seeing or hearing right

I tried to speak as I lost my sight

She weeped and sobbed, yelling as she cried, “

Why? You shouldn’t have done that!

Please call the ambulance someone please! Fast!”

I told her, “Don’t worry about me it’s too late

Because, I’m happy, as long as your safe.

You were the best thing that happened to me

Even hitting me with your car in the middle of the street

I don’t regret anything, Don’t look at me like that, don’t be sorry.”

I guess she didn’t hear what I had said, she just held me and cried

And I couldn’t do anything else but lay there and smile

Because my time with her was the happiest I’d had in a while

And there I lay, with my one True Love as day turned to night

And for once I was happy, because the Fortune Cookie was right

WTFFF

I wrote like, 900 words of a poem, a good one too.

But my computer froze, and I shouted, “POO!

Why is this happening to me now, Internet?! Fuck You!”

It was a good one, I worked all night

And now someone punishes me completely out of spite

I guess there isn’t much I can do

But start again and write the whole thing through

A long one it was but it’s gone, it was so abrupt

But sometimes in life we fall, so we pick ourselves up